HCA is a 5 Star property, The grounds are beautiful. You'd be hard pressed to meet nicer people that work harder than this staff. We found the accommodations extremely comfortable (Room 51) with a beautiful view - plenty of reviews here illustrate the environment. Pretty nice. That said, the welcome road into the property a was cratered reminder that this is off the 'first-world beaten path'. We rolled in after 5pm, shuttled into the bar and waited another 20-30 minutes for the ride to the room. Note: It was door to door 14 hours for travel - so we had the random uber/airplane/taxi seat 'ick' and generally tired. I suspect the 20 odd minutes in the lobby bar is to get the luggage to the room etc. however with a 3 pm check in - I would have rather waited the 20 minutes for luggage in the room - which was tempered like a walk-in freezer upon arrival. As I stated, room is clean, well kept, the desk mini-bar area (stocked daily, which I liked) was nice - plenty of everything and a shower the size my childhood bedroom.
All that said, my review is 4 stars (circles, whatever) because the food at this resort is, maybe, mid to average? I was surprised because many of the reviews said the food was pretty good. Some highlights - at breakfast, the juice is watered down and served on ice. We've traveled quite a bit - not the typical way fresh juice is served. I was assured it was just squeezed, but I have eyes and taste buds. The coffee had the same vibe, watered down. The food was average, nothing special. The croissants tasted like they were out of a bag. From yesterday. Frozen for sure.
The beach is pretty small (fyi to you beach walkers). The staff down there is super friendly (thx Julio) and ready willing and able to get you on a paddle board, into a sailboat, whatever. We had lunch down there most days. To say that the experience is below average would be kind. All the food is run down from the kitchen at Irina's. So nothing is ever hot - fries are soggy, burgers are under cooked or unrecognizable pucks. The bar pizza tastes frozen (which I'm sure all the ingredients are) and to partake in this feast, get comfy,it takes about 70 minutes. It's like snack bar food at your local bowling alley, only not as good. It's unfortunate HCA doesn't have a kitchen closer to the beach - and I feel sorry for the servers who have to face the guests and deliver this offering. Plus the lunch menu is eclectic, and weak in my opinion. Plus, they never switch it up.
With three restaurants, and 10 nights, I would safely say I had a decent dinner twice, both at Sir Rob's. This is the 'steak house' - but the steaks are paper thin. You'd get a better piece of meat at Longhorn. While the website may claim HCA: 'offers a Michelin-Caliber dining experience that caters to even the most discerning palates', I would argue that they don't come close. And no dinner at a resort should take two+ hours. During out first visit to the Lighthouse for dinner, it took 30 minutes to get the drinks. Hey, I'm cool with 'Island Time' etc - but 30 minutes? I would add that the 'tasting menu' (offered during our stay over the holidays) was a disappointment - most of it was served room temp and flavorless. Plus if you don't eat one or two things on that menu, suddenly you're looking to get a grilled cheese sent to your room. But don't be fooled. That, too, will be cold, old and take over an hour.
My take is that the food service operation here has a ways to go to be, as they claim, Michelin-Caliber. They also claim (as of the writing of this review) that 'Clear-Bottom Kayaks' are available to use. I can assure you, they are not only unavailable, they do not exist. So let's get that website refreshed, huh? The good news? This is the first trip in decades where i actually lost weight on vacation.
PS - Shout out to Mr. Ambassador, Rondel. A sweet guy that took great care of us. *Would not recommend this property for families (even with adult children).
