Manhattan receives about 50” of rain a year with 5” or so falling in September. On any given day this time of year, there’s about a 1/3 chance of precipitation. This year, there was an early nor’easter that dumped even more rain than usual. All of which makes the Virgin Hotel New York’s provision of umbrellas (or lack thereof) a wee bit puzzling for a five-star hotel.
My number came up in the NYC rain lottery one day during my stay. When I couldn’t find an umbrella in the room, I texted the hotel’s service team who responded that I could rent an umbrella in the front lobby for $40. Perhaps a $40 umbrella rental fee is a relative steal compared to the $700 or so Rolls Royce charges for its bespoke Teflon umbrellas (included in the doorways of some of its motor cars). When I arrived downstairs, however, I discovered there were no umbrellas to be had at any price. One move might be for Virgin to raise the umbrella rental fee to $100/hr, or make it variable, depending on how hard it is raining, to allocate the limited supply to guests who value keeping dry most richly.
This hotel has a good deal going for it: central location, friendly and predicably insouciant staff, comfortable beds and a commodious shower. The rooms (or “Chambers” as the hotel calls them) have the unusual feature that guests enter through the bathroom. It’s a bit odd at first, but the layout somehow works. I booked my “Sky Chamber Empire” room through the Edit by Chase Travel program which purported to bundle in a bunch of perks (“subject to availability and may vary by property”) along with a view of the Empire State Building. While I did technically capture a glance of King Kong’s tower, I had to stand in the far corner of the room to do so. This may be more of a function of the Chase booking engine than the hotel as I did not see the “Empire” room category offered on the hotel’s own site. In any case, even without a front-row view of the 102-story storied edifice, the view of Gotham was splendid indeed. One tip: bring your earplugs if you anticipate the lively activity of the streetscape below and the cycling of the HVAC system and/or compressor of the SMEG minibar will disturb your slumber.
Much has been made by other guests about the infernal and sclerotic elevator systems (valid) and the limited complimentary pool access hours from 8:00 AM – 11:30 AM before access fees and minimum purchase requirements kick in (true). But you’re not going to stay at this hotel for the pool which is optimized for lounging vs. laps. If swimming at swimmy heights is your NYC priority, stay at the Park Hyatt or Mandarin Oriental instead (previously reviewed).
One of the benefits of Chase’s Edit program is an included breakfast, however the property chooses to define it. At the Virgin Hotel NYC, breakfast has very specific parameters: drip coffee or tea, but no barista beverages. A single entrée, but no side of toast. “Any” Juice (excluding green or red – odd definition of “any,” no?), but not fruit. As I was enjoying my bowl oats served with complimentary bananas and supplementally purchased berries, I’ll be jiggered if Virgin Group founder Sir Richard Branson himself didn’t walk into the restaurant. I considered scampering over and asking him what he thought about the (lack of) umbrellas, but after assessing his formidable security detail that rivals that of Taylor Swift, I thought better of it.
The Virgin Hotels website asserts, “For too long, hotels have provided services and facilities that are tired and lack excitement. Customers are being nickel-and-dimed, and the most basic comforts are being ignored.” Hmmm. I guess an umbrella could fall outside of the definition of “basic comfort,” and charging some guests for an espresso vs. a drip coffee at breakfast might not technically be nickel-and-diming, but it sure feels adjacent.
When asked what he knew about operating an airline when he founded Virgin Atlantic, Sir Richard opined that he “had been on enough planes to know what’s wrong with them.” I’m not Richard Branson, of course, but I dare say I’ve been in enough hotels to know what’s wrong with them; my sense is that the Virgin Hotel New York (or at least the umbrella operations, pool parameters and F&B departments) is presently overindexing on backroom beancounters vs. the “bold, proud, playful… customer-first” approach that inspired the original Virgin brand ethos. Or as fictional New Yorker Don Draper once remarked, “Who the [heck] is in charge? A bunch of accountants trying to make $1.00 into $1.10?” Virgin deserves better.
If skies are cloudy and gray the next time I’m in NYC, I just might need to check in to the Umbrella Hotel Bronx instead.
